Even my stepmother’s siblings were scary. I was always afraid of one of her brothers. He had a very nice wife, small in stature and quiet. They had three children, two boys and a girl. One of the boys was handicapped in some way, but I don’t remember in what way. I saw very little of him, as he was always in the attic.
Many years later, when I was a cop, I read in the paper that Ann’s brother and his wife had been in a hunting incident. The police found her sitting against the tree with a rifle between her legs, pointed at her head, which suggested suicide. I did not believe that she committed suicide, although I’m sure her life was not a life of love.
I contacted a friend in the Bureau of Criminal Investigation to see if he could look into the story, but he told me that with the evidence they had, it could not be proven her husband did it. So that was it. The children have to live the rest of their lives with this memory, which is very, very sad.
THIRTEEN YEARS LOST
Life went on. I continued to date the man, Bruce, who worked at the same company as I did, and we were together for many years…for 13 years to be exact. I bought a piece of land and moved my little mobile home there and a couple of years later built two rooms onto it. It was comfortable. I loved my boyfriend’s father, so I cooked him supper every night, and he created a vegetable garden on the lot that I had purchased next to my home.
This garden was the father’s pride and joy. Previously, he had his garden up on the mountain, next to a relative’s house. The garden was too far from the house, and I was worried he would have a problem health-wise and no one would know; hence, we put the garden on my place. As fate would have it, he did have a heart attack in the garden. He was rushed to the hospital, but he did not make it alive. Very sad.
All during this time, I had one close female friend. We were as close as any friends could be. I had purchased a used, above-ground pool, which both of us spent much of our time at on weekends, floating on rafts. This friend had different men in her life over the years, but she eventually ended up with one who did not deserve her. Many things happened that she was not aware of and which I never told her about. Telling her then, or now, would only hurt her, as she is still with him. My only hope is that he has changed. During these years, we had many good times and helped each other when one of us was going through bad times. Her choice of men was as bad as mine, maybe even worse. I never really told her much of what had happened in my life, as I saw no reason to.
During those years, my boyfriend, Bruce, and I started an oil home delivery business. It became a decent business. I always worked other jobs to have my own income, because I did the work for the business without any pay.
My property and my mobile home were the collateral for his oil truck. That was paid off. The dream was to have a house on my property. My son, my partner, and I agreed to try to make that happen. I decided to obtain a modular home dealership, which led to our getting a nice home. To do this, I had to put my partner’s name on my property, which is one of the worst mistakes I ever made.
I gave my former mobile home with the extra rooms to a friend who dug the hole for the foundation. The mobile home is still standing with the extra rooms, and it is rented out on the friend’s property. A few years after my new home was put up on my property, my partner found what he thought was the “love of his life” and left. As his name was on the property and the house, all had to be sold. So much for having my own home and property!
SWEET SUSIE
When my son was in high school, he started dating a girl named Sue. She was a pretty girl with a lot going for her. She was very smart and had a great personality. When she went away to college, I think I missed her more than I missed my son. As happens in most first loves, for people so young, they grew apart. But Susie and I did not. For many years, wherever I worked, she would work. She was always an asset to whatever company we worked for. We spent a lot of time together as the years went by. We would play tennis almost every day after work. Our lives were always entwined in one way or another.
My son got married, and then Susie married, in a ceremony to which we all were invited. I was so happy for her, as I still am. She had twin boys and then another boy. All of this time she was working and doing quite well. She and her husband built a beautiful house and were happy with love and life. Then she got terrible news: she had breast cancer. Life was busy for her and me, so we were not in touch for awhile. When I heard the news about her cancer, I had to call her and hear her voice. She was fighting this terrible disease. We kept in touch at different stages of her treatments. I prayed every day for her, and I still do. She is doing well and invited me for this most recent Thanksgiving dinner, which was wonderful to see. Her parents were there, as were her sister and all the children. Susie has a special place in my heart and always will.
INCIDENTS IN MY MIDDLE YEARS
As I write about certain parts of my life, the following are a few of the most hurtful.
After I had purchased my land and put my mobile home there, I had rooms built on to it, which made my living room much bigger and gave me a nice bedroom,
The next purchase was a free-standing fireplace, which I loved. I purchased a decent car. These two purchases took place when my long-time boyfriend, Bruce, was out of town hunting. He somehow thought I would make changes only when he was out of town just to upset him. I certainly didn’t think I needed his permission for anything, as it was my money, my home, and it was my son and I. Bruce did not live with us at this time.
During my years of working at the oil company, two things happened that were important to me:
The first is the day a man with whom I worked, named “Dan,” who was one of the nicest people I knew, was making deliveries. He knocked on a customer’s door to ask her for help, as he was not feeling well. Quickly, Dan was taken to the hospital, but he died of a massive heart attack. Within a few hours, the hospital was calling my office, asking for his family to be notified, as the hospital needed to know what to do with the body. The hospital said they needed to be notified within one hour. I was the only one at the job. Dan’s wife worked at the local bank, and I knew I was going to have to tell her.
I called the town doctor and told him to meet me at the bank. I went to tell Dan’s wife that Dan had died. There is no good way to prepare yourself to tell someone a loved one has passed away. She was someone I knew quite well. It was heart-breaking to tell her.
The second incident was another one of those days a lot of people in our town would remember.
My desk was situated with a clear view of our oil company’s loading dock, where the fuel trucks would load up with oil or gasoline. On this day, it is important to note, all the district managers were visiting our facility; they had just left to take our manager out to lunch.
One of our drivers came in to the loading dock, started loading his truck with fuel, and came into our office to tell me that he had to use the bathroom and for me to watch his truck! I told him to go turn off the fueling and return to the office to use the bathroom. He refused. Any woman who has dealt with certain men in the workplace knows what I am saying. Within a very short period of time, the truck was not only filled with fuel, the fuel was running down the sides of the truck all over the parking lot and out into the street.
I had to call the Fire Department, which came to the scene and engulfed the entire area and the buildings with foam. As this foam reached the point that you could not see anything but the foam, the car with all the district managers came through the foam to view the scene. It was dramatic!
During this time, my son and I and Bruce, the man I was dating, spent a lot of time together. One evening as we were watching TV, my son said to Bruce and me, “Why don’t we try this as a family?” I never responded to that, as I really didn’t know how I felt about it. As time went by, my boyfriend slowly moved in. Oddly enough, we also had a mutual friend who would visit us almost every night.
At that time, almost all farmers would have Jamaican workers pick their crops. The requirements for the Jamaican payroll were very involved, and I would also help a few farmers with their Jamaican payrolls. Our mutual friend was a farmer, and I assisted his mother with their payroll. As time went by, I changed jobs and helped my partner get into the fuel oil delivery business, by putting my place up as collateral to purchase a truck etc. You know that story.
And so it began, the beginning of the end!
Within a few years I was working at a large spray materials company and at the Police Department and doing all the paperwork and billing for my partner’s business. I did this for a few years until I had to give up something, as I was burned out! I never took a paycheck from my partner’s business, but it was taking a lot more time, plus he had a business phone installed in my place.
I put my notice into the spray material company. They offered me quite a lot more money to stay, but there were other reasons why I would not stay working there, and so I did not stay.
By now my partner and I had decided to get a modular home. We went to Pennsylvania to see a dealership and ordered the house. As I have noted above, I had to put my partner’s name on my property and put both of our names on the house. Little did I know what a mistake I was making.
Now I’ll explain just how stupid I was.
Our mutual friend supposedly had a girlfriend named “Lori.” I had never met this girl, but Bruce asked me, when I had left the spray materials company, to put in a good word for this girl. I had a very good relationship with the district manager at the company, so I did, and Lori got the job.
This Lori was not our mutual friend’s girlfriend; she turned out to be my partner’s girlfriend. By now we had been together for 12 years.
The only way I found out Bruce was running around was by finding his note to a friend that said he was going away with his girlfriend for the weekend. When I do the laundry, I always check pockets before I put clothes in the wash, and the note was in his pocket. When I confronted him, he told me there must be something wrong with him, and he would get help.
Within a year he told me he was leaving me. I ask myself, since he already had this “love of his life” back when I had my land and my mobile home, why did he suggest we get the house jointly? Why go to such lengths to hurt me? Were those 13 years just wasted?
A few years later, when my ex-partner and his new wife had a son, he named him “Danny.” I know why he chose that name! Since she had never met Danny, I wonder if she does?
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We are serializing here the memoir KIDNAPPED TWICE: Then Betrayed and Abused, by Mary E. Seaman and myself, recently published by Outskirts Press and available in paperback and ebook formats from OP and amazon.com, bn.com, and other on-line booksellers. Abuse in her childhood led to losses through many decades.
My writing-editing-coaching site is http://writeyourbookwithme.com.
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