Sunday, January 29, 2012

CO-AUTHOR DREAMS HE IS ROOKIE COP

It’s 4:56 AM now, and I am fully awake, adrenaline-filled, ready to serve and protect. Less than an hour ago I dreamed I was a rookie cop, partnered with detective Lenny Golino, doing a midnight-to-eight shift, having coffee over our 3 AM “lunch,” when a call came in, and Lenny said we would take it. I grabbed my stuff from the table, stood up, adjusted my holster. The call had come from a familiar address, one we knew so well that I finished saying it for the dispatcher. It was from the elderly lady who has been bedeviled by imagined “little men” in her apartment. Of course, once we got rolling, anything could happen. It’s the midnight shift.

Then I awoke. I was not a rookie cop reacting to a call. I am a retired scientist, now a co-author with a former NYPD detective, current Private Investigator, private eye [“Private I.”?] Lenny Golino, whose vivid recounting to me of some of his experiences on The Force have excited me, as I hope they will excite our readers, once THE SHIELD OF GOLD, our book, is published.

I came downstairs from my bedroom to write this before I forgot it. Our dog, Brandy, found me and requested food and a walk, and I complied on this cool and clear night. I was still happily pumped up from my dream. Content as I am with my life and the choices I have made, I admit I was briefly very disappointed that I wasn’t that rookie going out on that police dispatcher’s call, rather than on Brandy‘s.



Post-script: Lenny and I published his memoir this year and it is available through Outskirts Press, amazon.com, bn.com et al., as a paperback or an ebook. We hope readers will enjoy it and find it informative.

 

Saturday, January 28, 2012

REASONS TO WRITE A BOOK

Another book-writing partner / coach weighs in.
-------- Original Message --------
Subject: 6 Reasons to Write a Book
From: Steve Harrison <email@freepublicity.com>
Date: Sat, January 28, 2012 10:01 am
To: douglas@tingandi.com


Have you thought about what writing a book
will do for you?
A lot of doors open to you when you become
a published author, from being known as the
expert in your niche to speaking engagements,
higher fees and a larger client base.
I have an article below that goes into more
detail of what you can expect when you
write a book.
I also want to share with you 10 winning
formats for writing a good book FAST!
SOME ADS DELETED

6 Powerful Reasons You Should
Write a Book--and How to Get
Started Today
By Steve Harrison

(note: this article originally appeared in my paid print
newsletter Book Marketing Update which goes to
members of my Million Dollar Author Club - get info
at http://www.milliondollarauthorclub.com
Many BMU readers already have one or more books
out, but others have a great idea for one but don't know
where to begin. That's why I'm devoting this month's
column to helping people turn their desire to write a
book into reality.
In the 20+ years I've spent working with entrepreneurs
and authors, I've found that one of the best ways to grow
your business is to be seen as an expert. People value
experts' opinions and advice. They want to buy from
the man or woman who wrote a book on topics they're
interested in.
How to become known as the expert in your niche
Surveys show that more than 80 percent of
Americans dream of writing a book someday.
But most will never do it. So if you have written
a book, people will see you as having accomplished
something that sets you apart from other experts.
Writing a book will elevate your status, your income
and your influence. It will also position you as a
knowledgeable authority they can trust.
Let me give you an example of how this works.
A few years ago, I spoke to a mortgage loan officer
who told me this story. He said that he used to get
calls all the time from people asking about his
mortgage rates. The minute he told them, they'd
hang up the phone and start calling around looking
for the cheapest rate. He realized he needed to find
a way to stand out from other mortgage brokers.
He then decided to target people who had a bankruptcy
in their past and now needed a mortgage. So he wrote
a book about how people who have had a bankruptcy
or foreclosure can still get mortgages. The book brought
him a lot of local publicity. He did a number of radio,
TV and print interviews and even got his own radio show.
Now people were contacting him after reading his
book or seeing him on TV. Clients would come into
this office and feel privileged to learn from an expert
on this subject, and some even asked him to autograph
their book. This is a powerful example of how writing
a book can help you expand your business tremendously.
What writing a book will do for you
A lot of exciting new opportunities will arise once you
become a published author. Here are some of the biggest
benefits that could come your way:
A lot of exciting new opportunities will arise once you
become a published author. Here are some of the biggest
benefits that could come your way:
  1. Free publicity. It's much easier to get radio, TV,
    magazine and online publicity if you have a book.
    The media need experts to interview, and often call
    upon authors to comment on timely topics in the news.
  2. More sales leads and referrals. Once you have
    a book, you can promote and sell it to your
    existing customers. Some authors give their
    books away to key clients to create more word
    of mouth. This is a great way for people in a
    service business to generate referrals, since a
    book is much more powerful than a brochure.
  3. Speaking engagements. People who book for
    corporate events, conferences or workshops may
    never have heard you speak, but they know people
    want to hear from someone who's written a book.

    Almon Gunter is a good example. He's a former
    world-class sprinter turned motivational speaker
    who wrote a book called Focus on the Final Seconds.
    Almon told me, "I had a very successful business
    before, but the book increased my speaking
    engagements by 50 percent."
  4. Higher fees. People are willing to pay an expert
    more money than someone without that expertise.
    Having your name on a book usually leads to higher
    name recognition--and the ability to command
    higher fees.
  5. Dream customers will find you. The best way
    to take your client base to the next level is to find
    customers who can spend a lot more money with
    you. This is something that happens all the time
    for authors. Their completed book is like having
    a marketing agent that never sleeps; it continues
    to build exposure and bring in new clients.
  6. It could lead to a whole new future. Your book
    can make the difference between feeling stuck in
    your current career and doing what you're really
    called to do. Greg Kozera was a Halliburton
    executive with a passion for leadership. He
    believes that no one is a born leader--you have
    to learn how to lead. After Greg wrote a book
    called Learned Leadership, it generated so many
    speaking engagements that he was able to leave
    his job and speak full time.
So, whether you want to reinvent yourself,
increase your sales and publicity or generate a
whole new line of business or a consulting
practice, a book can do that for you.
10 possible formats for writing a good book FAST!
Let's say I've convinced you that it's a good
idea to publish a book. How do you decide
what to write about?
I'd like to make it easier by giving you some
examples of different formats you can choose
from. Starting with a proven model will make
the writing process much less overwhelming.
(Note: most of these ideas are designed for
nonfiction authors.)
  1. The Mistakes Book. People are always
    interested in learning about mistakes they can
    avoid, so this is a popular format. A good
    example is this title: New Sales Speak: The
    9 Biggest Sales Presentation Mistakes and
    How to Avoid Them
    by Terri Sjodin.
  2. The How-to Book. I want to address a
    concern that many authors have. They often
    ask me, "Why should I put what I know into
    book form? Will people still buy from me if I
    give away this information?" Yes, and here's why.

    Dan Kennedy is a well-known copywriter who
    gets paid tens of thousands of dollars to write a
    sales letter. But he still wrote a book called The
    Ultimate Sales Letter
    . By revealing how difficult
    it is to write strong sales letters and how much
    work goes into it, Dan's book has brought him
    many new paying clients. When you give readers
    good solid information but don't tell them everything
    you know, they will want to contact you to find
    out more.
  3. The Question and Answer Book. Do people
    ask you questions when they hear about your area
    of expertise? Which questions are you asked most
    often? Maybe they could become the basis for a
    book. A good example is What's a Synthesizer?
    Simple Answers to Common Questions
    by John
    Eiche
    . Imagine having a book titled "Answers
    to Your Most Common Questions:" (about your
    topic), and see what comes to mind.
  4. The __ Ways to Do Something Book. You've
    probably heard of the bestselling book 50 Simple
    Things You Can Do to Save the Earth
    . This is
    a format that many authors have successfully
    imitated. You can use any number--7, 10 and
    101 are other numbers that are frequently used.
  5. The How to Hire Someone Book. Two books
    that use this format effectively are How to Hire
    a Nanny
    and Before You Hire a Contractor, this
    a great way to showcase your expertise and gain
    new clients by sharing information you've learned
    in your line of business.
  6. The Book of Interviews. J.M. Trippon is a CPA
    who followed this model when he wrote How
    Millionaires Stay Rich Forever
    . His book became
    a great networking tool that enabled him to
    connect with millionaires and interview them.
  7. The Collection of Stories. One of the bestsellers
    our company helped launch is Chicken Soup for the
    Soul
    . This format is easy to follow--you request other
    people's stories on a particular topic and choose the
    best ones to reprint (once you get their permission).
    Sales trainer Dan Seidman wrote another book I
    really enjoyed. In Sales Autopsy, he told and
    analyzed 50 funny stories about salespeople who
    have really screwed up a sale.
  8. The Memoir or Biography. Most of us love hearing
    other people's stories, if they're compelling and well
    told. That's why memoirs and autobiographies
    often show up on bestseller lists. Consider telling
    your own or a family member's life story or sharing
    lessons from your life.
  9. The Joke or Quotation Book. People don't think
    lawyers are funny, but two attorneys disproved
    that when they compiled The Lawyer's Joke Book.
    The media love topics that are funny and entertaining.
    This joke book opened many doors for the authors
    and led to dozens of media interviews.
  10. The Collection of Your Previous Writings. Have
    you been doing a blog or writing articles? Do you
    publish a newsletter or an ezine? These could provide
    lots of great material for a book.
I hope I've inspired you to embark on your own book
project. Writing a book is not as difficult as many
people think. Like all journeys, it begins with a single
step. I encourage you to take that step, and wish you
the very best in your quest to grow your business by
becoming a published author.
All the best,
Steve Harrison

Steve Harrison has done an excellent job in giving good reasons for writing your book and suggesting some types of books you might write. I encourage you to contact him, if you think it will be a good fit.

If you and Steve do not team up, consider me. I live in Orange County, NY, which will be local for some of my readers. I charge only $25/week [$100 per month] and can help you publish your book the way I did, through the subsidy press, Outskirts Press. I invite you to see my book sites, http://writeyourbookwithme.com and http://tingandi.com. My first phone or in-person consultation with you will be free.

Call me at 845 778-4204 or write to douglas@tingandi.com.

Thursday, January 26, 2012

"LIVING FOR LOVE," ORANGE MAGAZINE , FEB./MAR. 2012, pp. 39-43

Tina and I thank Brenda Gilhooly, editor; Deb Botti, writer; and Chris Ramirez, photographer, for a beautifully written and illustrated article about us in a magazine that is consistently exellent:

http://www.orangemagazineny.com/archive/022012/index.html

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

BOOK REVIEW: TING AND I: A MEMOIR

CONNECT: The World of Critcal Care Nursing, has a very favorable review by Dr. P. A. Burns, and it presents our Foreword by Dr. Richard F. Walker. Our thanks to the writers and to the editor, Professor Paul Fulbrook.

http://en.connectpublishing.org/issues_detail.php?journal_id=242

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

PATERNO, PEDOPHILIA, AND HOMOSEXUALITY

PATERNO, PEDOPHILIA, PEDERASTY, AND PROTECTED HOMOSEXUALS

 By Douglas Winslow Cooper

Penn State University football coach, coaching legend, Joe Paterno, lies in state near University Park, Pennsylvania. His reputation has recently been tattered by the revelation that he did not alert police to the accusation that an associate, Jerry Sandusky, was found by another associate to be having sexual relations with a young boy in a university shower. The boy was one of many in a program that Sandusky mentored, quite possibly one of many that Sandusky molested.

Paterno passed the information to superiors in the school hierarchy but not to police.

“Pedophiles” lust for children. They are male or female adults who have sex with young boys or girls. In more admirable eras, they were prosecuted and shunned. The psychological scars from such actions can last a lifetime.

The term “pederast,” for a man who has sex with a young boy, has fallen into disuse. The North American Man/Boy Love Association no doubt disapproves of the term. Those of us who disapprove of pederasty are called “homophobes.”

Note the degree to which homosexuals and homosexual acts have joined the protected class of That About Which We Must Not Be Critical. No wonder Paterno tip-toed around the issue. Was there proof? Photos? Tape recordings? No, just the testimony, wholly credible, of a staff member who observed the transgression.

If you want to be serious about protecting children from adult sexual predators, then you must face up to the fact that the men having sex with boys are homosexuals and their sexual conduct, in these cases at least, must be censored, criticized, prosecuted, regardless of the protestations of the Gay Lobby. Men who seduce or molest little girls deserve similar scorn and prosecution.

Yes, some of my best friends were gay, as the cliché goes, and in my case the cliché is true. These friends are dead now, from sexually acquired diseases, but I think that neither stooped to child molestation in his pursuit of personal carnal pleasure.

 

Monday, January 23, 2012

PRESS RELEASE: AUTHOR AND DETECTIVE INVESTIGATE CLAIM

AVA GARDNER'S DAUGHTER?


Douglas Winslow Cooper, Ph.D., and Lenny Golino, private investigator and retired NYPD homicide detective, are investigating the claim by a New York State woman that she is the unacknowledged daughter of film star Ava Gardner, who died in England in January of 1990. An initial investigation has revealed some facts supporting the claim, some casting doubt on it. Unsealing birth certificate records and obtaining further DNA testing are among the next steps.

January 23, 2012 (FPRC) -- Walden, NY - Dr. Douglas Winslow Cooper, author and retired scientist, and Lenny Golino, former New York Police Department (NYPD), now head of Gold Shield Elite Investigations, LLC, initiated their collaboration soon after a woman claiming to be film legend Ava Gardner’s unacknowledged daughter first contacted Dr. Cooper. She wanted a book written about her effort to show that she is Gardner’s daughter. Similar cases recently involved Judy Lewis, once-hidden child of Hollywood star Loretta Young, and a previously unacknowledged daughter of Frank Sinatra, who later obtained a payment from his estate.

On Thursday, January 12th, Golino and Cooper interviewed the claimant for an hour, after which Golino concluded, “She believes it, but we need confirmation.” Cooper noted there was some circumstantial evidence in support, including the similarity between the given names of Ava Gardner’s mother, “Mary Elizabeth,” and those of the claimant, “Marie Elizabeth.” Ava Gardner would have had to have been gotten pregnant at age fourteen and given birth unwed at fifteen in New York City, likely reasons for secrecy. Gardner’s biographers have noted her mother’s strict warnings about sex to her already beautiful daughter at this age and that Ava had a much older sister living in New York City, whom she visited several times before becoming an MGM starlet and marrying Mickey Rooney at nineteen in January 1942. Two more marriages, to Artie Shaw and to Frank Sinatra, and many affairs followed the break-up of that first marriage. Gardner died in January 1990, without any acknowledged children.

On Friday, January 20th, Golino and Cooper conferred with legal counsel on how to obtain further DNA testing and how to unseal the records surrounding the “corrected” birth certificate of their client, records sealed when she was 15, an unusual timing for such proceedings.

Individuals with information related to this case are asked to contact Dr. Cooper [http://tingandi.com] or Mr. Golino [http://GSEInvestigations.com].

 

Dr. Cooper’s degrees are in physics (A.B., Cornell; M.S., Penn State) and engineering (Ph.D., Harvard). He served on the faculty of the Harvard School of Public Health. Mr. Golino started Gold Shield Elite Investigations in 2009, after twenty-one years with the NYPD, having risen to the position of homicide detective, a bearer of their iconic gold detective shield.

 

Douglas Winslow Cooper, Ph.D.
264 East Drive
Walden, NY 12586 USA
douglas@tingandi.com
(845) 778-4204

Monday, January 2, 2012

LOVE CONQUERED RELATIONSHIP CHALLENGES


Tina Han Su and I, Doug Cooper, fell in love at Cornell University in February 1963. That love has lasted almost half a century so far, despite a series of obstacles we have had to overcome, the subject of this article. More information is presented in my recent book, Ting and I: A Memoir of Love, Courage, and Devotion, available through amazon.com.

Tina Han Su was born in China in 1944 as “Su Ting-ting.” As our names suggest, ours is an interracial romance. The first challenge, then, is to see past the distraction of race or ethnicity to be able to love the underlying person. Tina grew up, from the age of two, in America, so my being Caucasian was not strange to her. She was my first non-white girlfriend, but I had liked the looks of some Asian women, such as the actress Nancy Kwan, and Tina’s slender figure and delicate facial features epitomized feminine beauty to me. We found we had much in common, a rational rather than emotional outlook on life, a love of music, and a shared idealism that competed with our rationalism.

Next challenge: interracial couples were rare on campus in 1963. No one made a fuss, though some stared. Solution: do not care a lot about what other people think of you. Be inner-directed, rather than other-directed.

Biggest hurdle of 1964: parental disapproval. I was graduating. Both sets of parents thought that an interracial marriage was a risky proposition. We understood, even agreed. If we had been older; if we had been willing to move to Hawaii where interracial couples were common; if; if; if…. We were too young. We did not want to be estranged from our parents nor cause the other to be estranged. Solution: tearfully separate, hoping that perhaps some day we could reunite and marry.

Wait nineteen years.

In February of 1983, I called Tina while I was passing through Chicago on business. I knew she was married, suspected her marriage was a bad one, needed to know if we could ever be married to each other. She told me she had been considering divorce, had two boys [2 and 9 years old] and had recently been diagnosed as having multiple sclerosis, a disorder that could leave her --- as she is now --- quadriplegic, attached to a ventilator, fed through a gastric tube. We were still deeply in love. After a sleepless night’s deliberation, I asked her to marry me, not having seen her in sixteen years. She said, “Yes, yes, yes!” Each showed courage and a trust in the other. We met soon after, and each was what the other had hoped for. Dissolving her marriage was, of course, difficult, especially hard on the elder son, who elected to stay with his father. It took a decade for him to be reconciled with Tina. Our parents were no longer opposed to our marrying: Tina’s parents knew of her difficulties in the first marriage, and my first marriage’s failure was not of my doing, either. We would have to hope that, as her father said after the wedding, “Love conquers all.” He had been one of those conquered. It was almost twenty years to the day since we had parted.

Enough background, let us enumerate our problems and solutions:

1. A mixed-race couple is attractive to some and unattractive to others. People will sort themselves out. Friends will be found, often of other mixed-marriage types, racial, ethnic, religious. Don’t worry about those who do not choose to know you.

2. Step-parenting is tricky. Tina did not get between Phil and me, trusted my judgment. I was careful not to be over-bearing. “Tough love” was my style, with emphasis on both. Phil was much loved, deservedly so.

3. Add another child? We decided not to: in our early 40s, we were more likely to have a child with a birth defect; we would need our energy and resources if Tina’s MS progressed; we did not want any perceived distinction between such a child and the two existing sons.

4. Spend or save? Money is high on the list of causes for disagreements in marriage. We both tended to be savers, especially with the possibility that Tina’s MS might become more serious, quite expensive. I chose a job with IBM over some other possibilities partly considering IBM’s financial health and employee benefits. I took an early retirement package from IBM because it included continuing IBM’s health plan coverage, and Tina was showing some trouble walking at the time the buy-out was offered. IBM subsequently has spent millions of dollars on Tina’s nursing care, for which we are very grateful. We helped meet the challenge of Tina’s impending disability by prior planning.

5. Sex? Yes, of course. Tina volunteered for tubal ligation, sparing me a vasectomy, partly because she wanted me to have the option of having a child if this marriage did not work out. That is the kind of person she is.

6. Have Tina stop driving? We failed. She did not stop until she had plowed into a neighbors garage, while backing up, having mistaken the gas pedal for the brake pedal. She then surrendered her keys.

7. Maintain our love? Yes. Each values the other’s well-being more than his own. Each respects, even admires the other. Each still sees the person originally adored still present, little changed, in the person here now. Tina lets me lead, and I watch to see that I am going where she wants us to go … or at least where she is willing to go.

8. Managing the wounded partnership. We married for better or worse, in sickness and in health, etc. We knew race could be an issue. It was manageable. We knew Tina might be severely disabled. We accepted and prepared for that. The opportunity to be “together forever” [our motto] outweighed the opportunities lost. We viewed Tina’s disability as happening to both of us rather than to Tina alone, and we have faced it as a team. It is chance to be heroic in an often un-heroic world. That one unlucky element in our lives has been outweighed by the good fortune of being together in America. Tina was born bright and beautiful, and I was born bright. Our parents were educated and saw to it that we were also. To have met, fallen in love, remained in love, reunited in love ---all is fate or great good luck. We have felt the power of love and know the value of life, even with severe disabilities.

There are daily challenges, but we are meeting them with around-the-clock skilled nursing care at home. Our memoir gives information about how we handle that, as does our Web site,
http://quadriplegiccaresite.com .

A key to our success: “Tina comes first, but everybody counts.”

***

An abridged version of this is to appear at http://tokii.com.

 

Sunday, January 1, 2012

FINDING TIME

From TING AND I: A MEMOIR

Thinking about writing about Tina and me, I couldn’t imagine where I would find the time. Having started, I find it fairly easily.

Much time spent reading can be switched to time spent writing. Skim email, skim the newspaper articles, be selective going through magazines and websites. Cut back on reading fiction, watching sports, movies. No crossword puzzles.

Anything worth doing at all is probably worth doing less intensively, except book writing. Too long between sessions and there is too much forgotten, misplaced. Jam it together. One idea suggests another. Keep momentum up. This from a one-book expert.

I started with pieces and a vague outline. Some pieces fit. Some of the outline took a different shape. More pieces were written; more were fit in. Not the best way? At least it got the frightening project underway. “The best is the enemy of the good.” Don’t stop.

Now I understand why so many authors’ acknowledgments at the beginnings of their books praise the forbearance of their family and friends during the time they were immersed in writing. Even our dog, Brandy, has gotten short-changed. We’ll take longer walks together when the writing slows and the weather improves.