Saturday, July 6, 2019

GOOD GRIEF, "Funeral Choices"




Keep in mind that these are very personal choices, some of which may have been preplanned, while others are determined on an emergent basis. It is important to have a knowledgeable family or friend go with you when you meet with the funeral director. I have listed some of the choices you will be faced with during this time. The funeral parlor I used had a nice check-off list that made it clear what services were available.

Choice of funeral home
Family history of use
Recommended by others
Unknown
Type of funeral
Traditional with coffin and cemetery burial
Cremation with urn or scatter ashes
Home Funeral; Other
Type of service
Traditional
viewing
Private viewing
Memorial
Clergy involvement           
Church
service
Gravesite service
Memorial service
Burial container
Coffin style
and cost
Urn style and cost
Other
Burial site           
Local cemetery: ground or mausoleum
Military cemetery
Urn; body donated to science; other
Flowers (often donated afterward)
Funeral parlor
Cemetery
None; donation to charity in lieu of flowers
Obituary
What to include
Cost
How to disseminate
Sign-in book
On podium
On table
Who keeps
Prayer cards
Choice of card
Number of cards
Where to display






Speaker tributes
Family
Friends
Work associates
Music or singing
Who will sing
Who picks music
What kind of music
Photo tribute or video
Choice
Who to create
Who to remove
Communication regarding events 
Who’s in charge
Who needs to know
Method to disseminate information
Post-event gathering
Who coordinates
Where to occur
Catered or closed dishes brought
Other costs
Number of attendants from funeral parlor
Accessories used by funeral parlor
Hidden costs



                                       .Good Grief: Strategies for Building Resilience and Supporting Transformation


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With her permission, I am serializing here nurse Cheryl Barrett's valuable book on transcending grief. I had the pleasure of being her coach and editor through my Write Your Book with Me enterprise. 

Douglas Winslow Cooper, PhD

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