GRANDDAUGHTER’S GRADUATION
In June of 2013 one of my
granddaughters graduated from high school. I was happy to attend the ceremony.
Because my son and his family live an hour and a half from where I live, it is
quite a drive. The day was beautiful. I enjoyed driving my little
standard-shift convertible to the graduation.
PICNIC 2013
I had one of my best days in a
very long time a few days ago. I was invited to a picnic at my son’s
father-in-law’s house. He has a beautiful home that he pretty much built
himself, on a mountain, in the middle of the woods. It is a beautiful, peaceful
place. He feeds the wildlife, as I do.
My three granddaughters sat
with me on the porch as we ate. I am so blessed to know that they have a small
part of me in each of them. All three are young women now, and the oldest will
be leaving soon to go to college.
As we sat talking, I was
remembering moments from the past about them. They make me proud. I pray that
each one of them takes the right path in life and finds love and happiness.
After we had been talking
awhile, my son sat down with us. We kept on talking for a long time. What a
perfect day it was, one I will always remember!
FIGHT 2013
A recent incident has me very
upset.
A family member who is 90
years old had a very bad argument with the farmer who lives across the road.
This elderly family member’s son and our previous farm manager both witnessed
the dispute. The son stepped in to stop it. This family member plants a garden
every year and has a table out by our road to give his vegetables away. He also
mows a very dangerous hill for that same farmer. In the winter he goes from
driveway to driveway plowing people out. He never takes money for any of this.
The argument with the farmer
ended up putting the 90-year-old into the hospital. Recently, I went to the
hospital to visit our elderly family member, and as I sat there, I got more and
more upset. To think anyone would yell at a 90-year-old!
I, too, had a bad encounter
with this same farmer last year.
This time, when I got home, I
decided to go across the road to try to make sure that this never happened
again. I wanted his family to talk to this person so that he would think twice
before starting another such argument. What I encountered was yet another angry
person, who was just as disrespectful to me as his cousin had been with the
90-year-old. What terrible people!
The farmer who yelled at our
elderly relative uses his diabetes as an excuse for why he frequently yells at
people. I have diabetes, too; however, I do not go around disrespecting other
people.
DEATH OF MY BROTHER-IN-LAW
The call came from my sister
last week that her husband had died at home. Marlene lives approximately two
hours away, up in the Catskill region. It was a challenge for me to get all my
medicines together and all the supplies that I use daily in order to be able to
take the trip. As it turned out, I was on my way quickly, as I did not want to
be driving in the dark. About halfway there I realized I had forgotten my
clothes. The only clothes I had with me were the clothes I was wearing.
My sister was in bad shape! A
neighbor had stayed with her until I got there. Both my sister and her husband
had been off work for two years, Don because of his heart condition and lung
cancer, Marlene because of stress. She is going through a terrible time.
I’m going to try to go back up
there as soon as possible. She is afraid to be alone, which is a real problem.
I have so much work to keep up with at my house this time of year that I don’t
know what to do right now, but I have to come up with some sort of plan to
travel up there as much as possible.
My sister tells me she had a
rough day today. She had to pick up Don’s ashes. She brought them home and put
them in a special place in her house to honor his life. After it was all done,
she felt more at peace. He had chosen a place on their property where he wanted
his ashes to be spread. When my sister is ready to follow his wishes, she will.
But not now! My heart is with her, as she goes through this very sad time in
her life.
As the days and weeks go by, I
feel more and more useless trying to help my sister. She is afraid to live
alone. Her husband never taught her to do the things she will have to do now.
He also did not like to socialize, so most of their friends were lost through
the years. She has good neighbors who are doing the mowing and keeping an eye
on her, but she thinks she needs a friend living with her. I do not think the
friend she tells me about is going to move in. I am so worried about her! This
seems the first time in my life that I cannot fix the problem.
Even if I could move in there,
that would not fix everything. Our father’s drinking and her mother’s emotional
and physical abuse have affected my sister deeply. Yes, we talked about our
lives, but I still can’t fix them.
I am not at a crossroads. I’m
at a dead-end street. I can’t fix this! I never considered doing the things in
my life that I had to do as showing strength, but I guess it did. I don’t know
how, but I survived it much better than did my sister.
UPDATE, SEPTEMBER 2013
Many weeks have gone by, and I
still have not been able to get back up to see my sister.
Between medical appointments
and tests, farm work, animal care, etc., I cannot seem to reach a condition
allowing me to escape for a couple of days. The days are getting shorter, which
has put me into a panic mode. I do not want to drive upstate in the dark.
There have been some very bad
things happening with Alan’s daughter lately. He has asked me not to write
about them. I will make that decision after I have the time and space to give
it more thought.
I had dinner with my old
police friend and his wife. I really love both of them, and we had a wonderful
time. How nice to sit and talk to them! We need to get together more often.
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We are serializing the memoir Kidnapped Twice, by Mary E. Seaman and myself. It tells of her abuse in childhood and her slow recovery from it. You can get it in paperback or ebook format from amazon.com or its publisher, Outskirts Press.
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